SomaCow Media is proud to present SomaCow, brought to you in this hour by The Big Oil Companies who have agreed to bring the price of gas back down to a dollar a gallon by March of 2009.
WARNING… what you are about to read is speculation and rumor.
In the coming year, WaWa will spread across the country and battle 7-11 for dominance in feeding the late night people. They will start in Florida. On 434, right where there is an empty Mobile Station so I can fill up on my way to work without having to go out of my way. Passing under I-4, making a left turn across 30 lanes of traffic just to get tot he only gas station in 30 miles. Sheesh.
In the coming year, the RIAA will disband. Dr Dre will be fined for being a pirate. Lars will go to jail for stealing a Nutter Butter. And Lou Pearlman will take it in the button hole.
Blackberry will sign on as a sponsor for SomaCow and provide me with a never ending upgrade of their awesome product. Kawasaki will do the same and upgrade me to a 1400. Dickies will also sign up as a sponsor and start a new clothing line called Mickey’s Dickies. It will be AWESOME.
Corona will unleash the Corona Extra J and well as the Joey Corona. The Joey Corona will be kind of like an Aussie-Mex mix. Joey, Australian for cerveza.
Ah, rumors, how do rumors get started. Started by the jealous people. They get mad about something they had and now somebody else is holding.
But seriously, tell everyone that gas will be back to one dollar a gallon by March 2009. Imagine, paying one dollar a gallon, again! HooRay for Gas companies… and beer companies… and work clothing makers… and motorcycle makers… and Blackberry makers.
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[...] I’m sorry Mr. Hack.. You were not the one to start this decline in gas prices. You are not the architect of this amazing accomplishment. You have been weighed, you have been measured and you sir, have been found lacking. The statement, “Gas will be one dollar by March of 2009″ was made during an episode of SomaCow. [...]