Originally regifted at SomaCow.com. If you are reading this on some con Asian site blathering about pharmecuetacils, our work here is finished.
In this, our finest hour, we discussed Bad shoes, Bacon lasagna Fail, and we hark the Harold Anal Gel regarding a holiday of such stupendous splendifferanimousacity, I just don’t have the words.
It’s almost Mickmas, kids, and that puts us at SomaCow in a giving mood. So much so, that we have gifted YOU, the teeming masses of the Heard, with an opportunity to own some cotton! I am talking about T-shirts, people. They are on sale, they are nifty, and you can buy them here.
Mickey is aging again, apparently. I know this will sound odd, but… I have now known Mickey for, like, 9 years.
He doesn’t change.
Like, okay, you know how he is always dieting? HE NEVER LOSES WEIGHT. And it’s not that he is fat, cause he never GAINS weight. He doesn’t age, his voice doesn’t change, his skin, hair, eyes, demeanor, style, and the cut of his very jib are the EXACT SAME as the day I met him.
I am starting to think he might be a T-1000.
So, what do you buy for the man who thinks he knows everything? I’ve been on the horns of this dilemma since ten minutes ago, when my wife leaned over and said, “hey, it’s Mickey’s birthday soon.”
Do I go full man, maow maow man and buy him something for his bike? His truck? His gun?
Do I go sentimental, and make him a scrapbook of all the great time he and J saw eye to eye on a matter?
Do I get him a pony? A hooker? A hookah? A snapdragon? Peas? A Tattoo? A Dog?
I know this much… He does a lot around this website. The forums, the files, the audio uploads and clean ups, the whipping of the Production Staff, the flogging of the Hopper, the fighting of various and sundry virii, the drafting of graphics, the forming of ideas…
Christ… What do EYE do around here? Besides bitch and blog poorly?
http://www.twitter.com/somacow – +1 point for every positive tweet you send his way about him. No cap. Make sure you use the hashtag #Mickmas
If you have a Mickey in your life, hug him! Let him know how much he means to you!
Tags: bacon, birthday, comedy, diet, gift, internet, lasagna, lose weight, mickmas, orlando, Podcast, radio, shirt, somacow, talk, twitter
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Don’t think of Ross as anti-absolute. Think of him like more of a Fair Witness. He believes what he sees. Although he can’t guarantee that it hasn’t changed after he’s turned his back.