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This is a blog, working to keep me answering the question, Do You Want To Die? I am Geoff. Pleased to make your acquaintance.

Today I was inputting my food intake to Lose It, software I use to track calories and exercise, and I happened across a message from a friend saying “Sensa. It works when you are ready.”

Rather than ask facebook to bear my load, as it were, with a 500-plus word reply, I figured now would be a good opportunity to explain my thinking regarding diets, supplements, juicy juices, foot-toxin absorbers, banana pepper suppositories, add-ons, belly shakers, and other weight loss paraphernalia.

I am against them.

Easy! Whoa! Before you fire up the world-wide internet and copy-paste thirty seven new studies and your friend’s pants that tell EXACTLY why what I just said isn’t true. Stop throwing stuff, and listen.

I got fat eating too much food, certainly, but I also ate bad food. Me getting healthy is about taking steps.

I was talking earlier about putting together a cost comparison of my life now to my life a year ago. I am still working on that, but what I have learned in the meantime is that I used to eat a lot, sure, but I used to eat a lot of very bad food.

I would once console myself, when I was crazyfat, that at least I was getting a good balance of meats, veg, bread, and very little salt and sugar.

I was lying to myself. My weekly diet would often consist of 10 or more trips to restaurants and fast food establishments. I would eat tons of food, but, worse, tons of chemicals. Preservatives, emulsifiers, food dyes, refortified nutrient content, fat blockers, additional sweeteners, modified gums and -itols, acids, artifical flavors, partially hydrogenated buttsechs cream, and on and on and on.

The list of food additives that I do not encounter now is frightening and long.

All of that shit does not all come out in your shit, I believe. It stays with you, like an unwanted holiday houseguest, still laying about come Flag Day, monopolizing your resources and working against your objectives.

There is evidence that suggests weight loss is, at best, stalled when foods that are not food are consumed.

I am hereby calling artificials, supplementals, and all the other crap being sold to us as UnFood. Like the UnDead, it is difficult to disperse UnFood, it may kill you if you are not careful, and people generally do not believe the truth about it until it is too late.

Did you ever notice that just about every fat person you know that does not want to be fat drinks diet soft drinks? AND YET THEY ARE STILL FAT.

Sweet Death!

Did you ever notice that just about every person who sprinkles fat inhibitors on their food eventually finds that lost weight again?

Did you ever notice that all of the diets, drugs, supplements, and such are always sold on late night TV, or on failing radio stations, or in the back of crappy, desperate publications?

Think about Apple, as a product. I do not care how you feel about Apples. That is irrelevant. Just think about the Apple product. Computers that work so well, they were able to open a whole store consisting of just display models of their computers. Think about Goodyear tires. Think about any product that is reliable enough to stand on its own merit, and be sold as such.

If a weight loss product existed that worked, it would be in its own store, not on aisle 72, behind the steroid socks at your local general poison center.

Myoplex, the shake, apparently has high levels of arsenic.  Olestra makes your anoos ache. Atkins can trigger health disorders.

Sensa makes your body fail to digest and utilize fat. It does nothing to the cholesterol, high sugar, high salt, etc. that you are consuming. Why not just swallow a trash bag, and then eat your food, and when you are done, pull the bag back out?

I am trying to get to a place where everything I put in my body heals me, makes me whole again, provides a nutrient, and enriches my cellular makeup.

I am trying to stop evaluating foods SO much by taste. I tasted lots of yummy bad stuff for a long time. It is time to put away those things, and eat to live, not the other way around.

I believe people should do what works for them. Right now, I have lost half the weight to my goal by eating good food, not eating shitty food, and walking when I remember to do so(getting a BIT better at that).

Who is to say when I get down to that last 80, 50, 20 pounds, and cannot lose the weight, week after week, month after month with no change, that I too will not seek out some shady solution in a bottle?

I can’t say never.

But for now, fuck no! Do you have any idea what the longterm effects of that Sensa shit will be? Me neither.

Want to know my REALLY effective weight loss technique?

Eat seven servings of vegetables a day. Go ahead and try. It’s quite a bit of chewing.

For an added challenge, no salt, minimal olive oil, no butter. Pepper is fine. Steamed or raw is ideal.

By the time I plowed through all seven today, I didn’t even want to TALK, I was so mouthsore.

Thanks, as always, for advice, tips, and suggestions! I consider everything, and I try to research the hell out of it when you folks suggest it. I hope you see that I am not adhering to a “get skinny quick” scheme or plan.

I am building a body to care for my daughter’s father.

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icon for podpress  149: Boomtown Fell Down [1:02:39m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

SomaCow Media, Inc. in proud to present SomaCow, brought to you in this hour by Text-Link Ads… If you have a blog worth a damn, you should be using them.

Ah, Florida – In this hour, we discuss what is wrong with our home state skillet, and why the rest of you people no longer want to grace her shelly beaches with your overwhite fat flesh. It looks like the streams of “New Family” arrivals into our fair state have dwindled to lows not seen since the great Sadness of ‘77 (see also, Dumb Gov., Gas Shortages, and Stupid Hair). Whereas we had once been content to sit back and wait for the multitudes to settle down in our suburbs, lapping up the over-chlorinated groundwater, settling into their stucco empires and demanding the immediate erection of god knows how many Wal-Marts, Walgreens, and Walled Communities, it is now apparent that we can no longer count on John and Jane Q. Pennsylvania to swell our ranks.

So, what is a suddenly single stategal like Florida to do to make ends meet? We used to simply pay tribute to The Mouse, as The Mouse would attract dollars to its various theme parks and overpriced resorts, allowing us the occasional mealy morsel in the form of a Bed Tax. With a tanking economy, the idea of waiting for millions of vacationers to show up with a fistful of financial stability doesn’t seem to be in the cards.

Some people scream, “Let’s get some GAMBLIN’ already!” – I ask those people to look at New Jersey, or those god-awful southern states along The Hurricane Brim. Poor bastards live hand to mouth, and most people with sense can see that gambling makes Casinos and Land Developers rich, not citizens. Plus, they attract crime, and as we are rapidly advancing on the Murder Capital of the Country prize here in Orlando, I doubt we can afford to plug in a giant neon bandit brigade right now.

And so, we at SomaCow have a simple solution – Boobs.

I know, we ALWAYS say boobs, but, seriously, boobs.

Open the finest strip clubs in the country. Kick out the sleaze, the ne’erdowells, the coke dealers and the just plain creepies. Build strip clubs on every corner, and stock them with clean kids with business degrees and fresh immigrant poon. STATE OPERATED STRIP CLUBS is what I am driving at. Every girl that does enough sit-ups to be able to hold her own weight up sideways on a brass pole gets a tax break. We have the sun for tanning, it’s certainly hot enough to make most girls want to get undressed, all we need is the legislation to allow a friendly neighborhood boobecue on every corner. Get rid of the stupid purple buildings, and the creepy smoked glass, and the lame ass gold chained fur chested fauxmafia types, and make a strip club into the kind of place a man would proudly bring his kids to live beside. I gotta get some more facts here, so consider this one in the works. Mickey announced his intention to open the first prototype!

We’re still recovering as a city from Nipple-Shock. It seems that the WWE had to modify their promotional materials here in Orlando so that MALE wrestlers nips were not showing. When I first heard about it from Xander on The Lunar Room, I realized that I do not currently have a large enough font to display my wtf-acity.

Speaking of wtf-acity…

all_religions_are_fairy_tales_billboard.jpg

I mean, why would anyone want this taken down? It’s the truth, right? Or is it? Should you raise your children with religion? religions? If you do will they turn out like J and sue the church?

Mickey actually quotes Bill Clinton in his Life Coaching this week at the :40 so check it out!

J doesn’t get aroused in strip clubs. I am just saying.

We’re never taking down the following great bands:

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