230: Kiss Kiss Bang Bang [58:14m]:
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SomaCow Media Networks is proud to present SomaCow, brought to you by The Southern Classic Gun and Knife Show.
Normally, this space is used to describe what went on during the show to which you are about to listen. Let me give you a brief rundown, we discuss sickness, the coming apocalypse, J’s meat, J’s meat in Geoff’s mouth, plans for economic recovery, mortgage strategies, Dr. Phil, the future history, and the next President.
We also discuss the need of a whittler in every post-apocalyptic clan.
With that being said, I want to remind everyone to abstain from voting. Leonardo DiCarprio told me that I shouldn’t vote. He makes a good point. At this point in time, every opion, every choice, seems to be a turn for the worst.
I will be running for an elected office soon, and when I do, I can promise that I will not fuck things up worse than they already are. I will provide the people with CHOPE. I believe the Beatles once said, “All you need is Chope, Chope… Chope is all you need.” I have tonnes of CHOPE (and since I wrote it like a British person, or Madonna, that makes me look smarter and more qualified). I have so much CHOPE, that I leave CHOAP residue in the shower. I have enough to CHOPE to give each taxpayer enough CHOPE to hang themselves. I am so full of CHOPE that Catholics call me CHOPE Benedict XVI. I will make sure each school is equipped with a teleCHOPE and a microCHOPE to ensure that “Childrens do lurn”. I will have the government buy each doctor a stethaCHOPE when they graduate medical school, in hopes of lowering medical bills. I promise that only legal immigrants will be invovled in trimming my CHOPE’iary.
Image by Getty Images via Daylife
When the time comes, if you are able, I CHOPE you will vote for me. I only CHOPE it isn’t to late to save this great country, this land of ours, this shining city on the hill. Maybe with a little CHOPE and water we can clean the stains off of our reputation. Some will say that I am leading this country down a slippery CHOPE, but I say it is a slippery CHOPE of goodness and smiles and tickly giggly happy feelings.
I am Mickey, and I approve this message.
Paid for by the Vote for CHOPE campaign.
Tags:
chope,
European Capital of Culture,
Garden,
health,
Liverpool,
Madonna,
Medical school,
money,
Pope Benedict XVI,
Roman Catholic Church,
Topiary,
United States
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