Posts Tagged “IHOP”Originally bucked at SomaCow.com
Gentlemen Broncos “Yeah, uh-huh, that’s right…we bad…” I’m referring, of course, to team SomaCow.net’s recent victory in the Gameshow Radio “Titans of Trivia” contest, hosted by Curtis Earth, a man who is to trivia what David White is to old TV sitcom bosses. I don’t get out much in the mornings, so the drive to the radio station was exciting for me. I passed a strip club whose marquee advertised “Spring Blowout”. I don’t know what that means. I guess I don’t get out much in the evenings, either. Joining me in delivering the trivia ass-kickery were our own producer Ross, and the flight-worthy Bill, a loyal, if distant, fan. Combined, we felt we outweighed the competition by as many pounds as IQ points. Our opponents were a trio of punk-ass bitches young men preparing to graduate from Rollins College. Their team name was “Potty Trained” (or something like that), so you get an idea of the high academic standards of that fine educational edifice. The youngsters chided us for our advanced age, suggesting that we might win if most of the questions were related to vaudeville, The Great Depression, or “tv and film star Kitty Carlisle”. We returned their good natured ribbing by replying that Potty Trained might win if the questions concerned how to pwn n00bz for phat lootz in World of Warcraft, having adults buy beer for you, or “getting your ass handed to you by hot, witty guys much older than you”. We took our places at the microphones for the first round of questions, which was “mano a mano” (spanish for “mayo with mayo”). Ross did well, I didn’t totally suck, and Bill rocked, too. At the end of this first round, the score was tied at four, sending Potty Trained into fits of celebration “(”Dude!”, “Whoa, dude!”, “Dude!”) accompanied by much heartfelt dapping. The second round consisted of five questions. Each team wrote down their answers, and were allowed to confer with their teammates. Bill surprised Ross and me with his vast aquatic knowledge, Ross surprised Bill and me with his intimate familiarity with rich guys’ wives, and I surprised everyone by remembering to spray the Renuzit after I used the studio restroom. When the dust, and my Rooty-Tooty-Fresh-n-Fruity from IHOP, had settled, team SomaCow.net emerged victorious by the unbelievably manly score of 24-9. Twenty-four to nine. XXIV vs IX. Our score was nearly three times theirs. I told them I wouldn’t rub it in. Twenty-freaking-four to a measley, quite feminine, nine. I thoroughly enjoyed the experience, and hope to go again someday when I am allowed time off from my day job again, which I estimate should occur sometime before the sun swells to engulf the Earth. In the meantime, we plan to send Mickey in to bat cleanup. We hope to God they have some questions about hunky stud movie stars and Miley Cyrus. <This is where the picture of us would have gone if Ross had sent it to me> <Oh, no, wait, here it is…>
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