SomaCow

SomaCow Media, Inc. is proud to present SomaCow, brought to you in this hour by Repticon. For all your stinging, biting and creeping horror needs, Repticon is a one stop shop for pets sure to scare the living crap out of your neighbors.

Saturday was a big day for me and my wife, as we decided to actually leave the SomaCow Studio Compound and Sausage Emporium and head out. I had been told by a friend that Repticon made for a good fun walk-around, so we piled into the Saturn Running Show and headed over.

Place was amazing. I talk about it some in this episode, and Jen got a buttload of excellent pics which you can check out while listening – Some of these things have otherwordly colors, and blew my mind. Hell of a lot bigger selection than what we see at Pet Bazaar or any of the local cricket and mealworm shops.

There were lots of women there, surprisingly. I really do not know what that is about. Mickey and J say Snakes=Penis. Mickey feels that pets signal the death of a person’s social life, and I tend to agree.

Those of you that like snakes, you should head down to the Central Florida Zoo and wave “hi” to a good friend of ours serpents, both of whom idle away their luxuriant life in happy herpe heaven. Maybe next weekend I will hit the zoo and get you guys some pics. God knows something good has to come out of that camera I bought Jen.

We talk a lot about snakes, and Mickey clues us in to what it REALLY means when a chick touches a reptile. I wonder what it means when a chick touches her iPod iTouch, that she won from SomaCow Media? Take the test and win!

Also – PSA -don’t have hermit crabs as pets- You think it’s cute. Your kid may say they do, but they are lying. Stop scaring your children, people.

We finally agree that, for some people, reptiles are just their “Thing” – Everyone needs to have a thing, something that they get nutty for, or follow religiously. Mickey’s might be comics, mine might be authors and their first editions, and J… J loves shrimp.It came up during the episode, and maybe you can sound off here: How much would you pay for a piece of the moon, or what object would you pay an exorbitant amount for, far above it’s supposed “value”?

Check out J’s NewsBomb at the :40, where he makes Mickey AND I laugh. No. REALLY!
In sadder news -

Guess who’s Back?

Back Again?

Nader’s Back.

Stupid Bastard.

Yeah, it didn’t rhyme, but there is no less evocative, more meaningless, less likely candidate to ever announce. I have more belief that Chavez, or Charlie Chaplin, or Charlie freaking Brown, could be elected, than Ralph. S. Mouse Nader. Dude is a perfect example of the guy that just does not know when to leave the party and go the F home. And that’s coming from a card carrying member of the Green Party. That whole organization is falling apart at the seams. Maybe I will fix it in a later episode.

We rounded out the hour with some Oscar talks. We must just not get out to the theaters enough, cause I have not seen a single big contender. Give me some suggestions, listeners. I saw 3:10 to Yuma, and it was excellent. What else from this year’s harvest should I be seeing?I apologize for the Jungle Fever singing. Sincerely.

Don’t forget to check out Justice at the Club at Firestone, coming soon. Get in, get’tained, and let us know how it was.

And enjoy the following hissy hissy tunes in this episode:

• Cobra Starship – Bring It (Snakes on a Plane)
• Bittybox – Snake Eyes

Tags: anything, bastard, bazaar, bittybox, brown, camera, central, chaplin, charlie, chavez, club, cobra, comedy, contest, cricket, dance, emporium, firestone, fl, flickr, florida, free, green, independant, independent, ipod, itouch, justice, mealworm, mouse, music, mysgyn, nader, nikon, orlando, oscar, party, penis, pet, Podcast, radio, ralph, repticon, reptile, s, sanford, saturn, sausage, say, snake, starship, stupid, talk, woman, women, zoo

SomaCow Media, Inc. is proud to present SomaCow, brought to you in this hour by Barackolyspe Now, coming soon to a theater near you.

In this, our finest hour, we lay waste to the waste layer of an entire generation, namely, World of Warcraft. It’s time, good people of the world, to slough off the scales of sedimentary life, to brush away the moss that has formed so slowly, and yet so completely, over your backs and hearts and libidos as you sat, day after day, endlessly grinding levels in an effort to stop getting killed on raids so quickly. Free yourself from Blizzard Entertainment and move the hell ON from this bloated, overdone franchise of games. Besides, Star Craft II is out, and you know you want it.

Normally, dear listener, Jen writes down simple one sentence liner notes in an effort to help me fabricate these blogs. Today, I find it necessary to impart to you all what she has transcribed for my use at this time:

J uses it to take a break-should walk or have sex with his wife.

What more can be said that that?

Mickey has brilliant plans for a new restaurant, which we will be opening as soon as we finish the other 75 business ventures we are currently working on. Suffice it to say, we know our target market, and are hard at work finding an architect that can design a dining room to accommodate that much weight. Who designs circus tents, anyway?

We spend some time discussing the mystery that is the modern hot dog. Whether it be the infamous goop dog (does anyone have a photo of this supposed food product?) Or a strange buttload of hot pressed hogmeat, Greek style, we pay homage to the Tube Meat.I also have been literally attacked by the classmates, friend finder, and highschool hores where is they now type sites lately. Do you have really good friends from childhood, people that you have known all your life, and will always remain daily-tight with. I don’t mean fond of, I mean “have lunch with them daily”? I think it’s a shame, but the reality of the internet is that we can use it to choose the people we speak with, whereas childhood friends are just a happy happenstance of proximity and scheduling. Weird, and so precious that you retain such friendships if you are able.

Mickey gives a double dose of the LifeCoaching, both in segment and a personal aside to Today’s Male Youth.

We also discussed the base falseness of women, specifically, being extra nice to a person’s face when secretly you wouldn’t piss on their mother if she were infected with some weird bacteria that specifically required urine in order to combat terrible deep tissue cramps, or something. I don’t know, women just do weird stuff.

Come up and say hi to us and bye to a very good friend of ours, The Uberbastard

Wednesday Night at The Willow Tree Restaurant in Downtown Sanford. Here’s a map, so you won’t get lost.

Clickity Clina, The Clinese Clickah

On street parking is usually pretty easy to grab. Share the boot, have some sausages, and hit on Theo’s excellent multinational staff. Employees, not his actual mannschaft.

We enjoyed the following footlong bands during this episode:

• Straight Outta Junior High – Target Has My Heart
• 350 – Battle Cry

Tags: 350, barack, barackolypse, blizzard, buffet, comedy, craft, cramps, dog, entertainment, fat, friend, goop, high, hot, independant, independent, junior, mannschaft, music, nice, obama, of, orlando, outta, people, Podcast, radio, restaurant, sanford, sojh, star, straight, talk, three, tree, uberbastard, warcraft, willow, women, world