Originally trying to save lives at http://somacow.com
SomaGift
Lifecoaching
Far Side
Wiki Leaks Leaks
That Baptist “church” that shall remain nameless
Salvation Army Ban
Killing Me Softly With Smoking
Posts Tagged “smoking”Normally, this webpage is where we post the show we do, called SomaCow. It’s talk, commercial free, and pretty funny, unless you are not funny, in which case it can be quite serious. But when we are NOT entertaining you with our voices, I am here, yammering about my health and answering the question – Do You Want To Die? I’ve never suffered from overconfidence. Sometimes, people hear my voice for the first time, and they think, “What arrogance! What cocksuredness! What a strange tendency to go all high pitched when excited!” But I assure you, I have always been uncocksure, or something. I suppose it has quite a lot to do with what I feel about myself. If I am not useful, valuable, necessary, why should I care for the organism that houses me? I smoked for 20 years. Apart from some time I spent institutionalized, I did it every day, often to the tune of a pack, later in life to the edge of two packs. I engaged in a habit that was guaranteed to isolate me, socially, from more than half of the population. Those who choose not to smoke, you know, “healthy” twerps, would naturally avoid spending time with me. Women who cared about their skin, hair, teeth, pocketbooks, and smell would naturally not be on my radar. I would almost be guaranteed to have friends that drank, or used drugs. Certainly, people who were disillusioned with life. I mean, who the hell else would pay a corporation to poison their bodies and feed them ashes? Why I was willing to do that is beyond me. The fact that I am on the other side of it is the most wonderful, freeing, Elysian feeling I’ve felt. It’s like a tiny orgasm, every time I wake up and draw a breath and do not desire a cigarette. I heard from a friend the cravings may return. I would appreciate it if they never did, but I am ready for them if they do. Because of the weight I have lost, I now fit into dress shoes again, and can tuck in my shirt without looking a complete mess. I did so today, and went to a work conference. I sat, learning, for four hours without feeling my spine ache from my giant body crushing down on a normal chair. At lunchtime, I had a wonderful meal in a pretty place… Here I sat with people I respected, enjoying conversation, not sweating about when I would get my next fix, not embarrassed about the burn holes in my shirt, not horrified that my cancer breath was circling the table, informing everyone of my stank presence.
Far from cigarettes, greasy cheeseburgers, mountain dew goo, massive iced coffees soaked in sweet cream and extra extra sugar, cinnamon twist sticks, and all the other things I used to shove in my body to try and wake it back up to “operational”. I had the Cobb. It was tasty. It was also $14.00.
But once in a while, I am worth it. Tags: cascades, cigarettes, cobb, diabetes, hyatt, Salad, smoking, stopOriginally lyricised at http://somacow.com
Rush |
|
|
Entries (RSS)